BierhalunkenBlog

Archiv für Kategorie 'Spass'

Bankenkrise – Es gibt nichts zu verlieren

Abgelegt unter Politik, Spass am 17. April 2010 von Trafo

Comments Off

Climategate verhindert Endsieg

Abgelegt unter Spass am 4. Februar 2010 von Trafo

1 Kommentar »

Wissenschaftspresseschau

Abgelegt unter Spass, Wissenschaft am 17. Dezember 2009 von Trafo

NonScientist Journal Cover

via The People’s Cube

Comments Off

Hoffentlich passiert das nicht in Kopenhagen

Abgelegt unter Spass am 28. November 2009 von Trafo

Comments Off

The invention of time

Abgelegt unter Spass am 27. Juni 2009 von Trafo

Time was first invented by Palestinians from the culturally rich, beautiful ancient nation of Palestine in around 7,000 BC as a means to measure progressiveness. At this point, all nations of the world were able to bask in their progressive beauty simultaneously.

Before too long however, probably around the industrial revolution, imperialist companies such as Halliburton and Chevron were finding it difficult to wage wars for oil in foreign countries. They would leave in the morning, and by the time they arrived on foreign soil it was night time and they were tired. So began an international conspiracy to oppress Palestinians by changing world time zones so slowly that nobody would notice, and the capitalist entities could trade their wars and oppression all around the clock.

Palestine before it was raped by Imperialist time zones

It was a slow process, however, in the 1940’s Imperialist Zionist Neo-Fascist Albert Einstein tried to expidite it by accusing the Palestinian model of time to be faulty. He suggested that time went faster when subjected to less gravity. These racist allegations were subtly embedded in his famous Theory of Relativity, which was a thinly veiled attempt to undermine and attack Palestinian sovereignty. It also meant imperialists could not only manipulate time zones due to location, but also due to altitude. It worked, and the Zionist Fascist State of Israel was formed in 1948 on the blood and bones of Palestinians unable to defend themselves due to unexpected bouts of darkness.

Zionist Oppressor Einstein taking the credit for inventing time

Attempts to debunk Einstein’s racist theory were heavily suppressed by Zionist Republican conspiracies, thankfully however the atomic clock was finally invented to prove the theories wrong. Whilst it is widely believed that the Cesium atomic clock was invented by Louis Essen in 1955, progressive revisionist historians have correctly placed the invention of the atomic clock by Al Gore in 1979, shortly before he invented the internet.

Comrade Al Gore with his newly invented Cesium Atomic Clock

Imperialists attempted to claim the atomic clocks proved Einstein correct and that time did indeed travel faster at different altitudes. Al Gore bravely fought these claims with an award-winning powerpoint presentation proving that time was actually affected by CO2 emissions, once again proving that Palestinians were world leaders in cultural and academic genius until they were all but destroyed by Imperialism. Einstein fled to America and tried to invent the atomic bomb to destroy Palestine, but the Palestinians acquiesced to big oil business by allowing the oppressive new time zones to remain, proving they were prepared to sacrifice so much for peace.

Quelle: Kommentar auf The People’s Cube

Comments Off

Gier ist wie Gravitation

Abgelegt unter Politik, Spass am 24. September 2008 von Trafo

If unusually many airplanes crash during a given week, do you blame gravity? No. Greed, like gravity, is a constant. It can’t explain why the number of crashes is higher than usual.

Quelle: Division of Labour

Comments Off

Happy Independence Day!

Abgelegt unter Spass am 4. Juli 2008 von Trafo

fireworks

Comments Off

Roadmap

Abgelegt unter Politik, Spass am 24. Januar 2008 von Trafo

Israel will supply fuel, food, basic goods, weapons and ammunition and anything else the Palestinians need or demand. In return, Israel will promise not to attack terrorists ever again, “This seems to me a fair compromise that the world community can accept and most importantly, it will stop Zipi from crying. I just can’t stand to see her like that,” said Barak.

But despite the favorable decision, Palestinians were still skeptic, “It all depends what kind of weapons Israel gives us and if they are actually ready to stop targeting innocent terrorists,” said Ahmad Zuf, a Hamas spokesman, “If they are really willing to let us murder them with impunity then perhaps we have indeed reached a turning point in the peace process. But I’ll believe it when I kill it,” added the Hamas spokesman.

Israeli Satire Laboratory

Comments Off